Amo la mia famiglia

(^ translation^): I love my family. 


Dictionary.com defines the word family as: "a basic social unit consisting of parents and their children, considered as a    group, whether dwellingtogether or not: the traditional family."

1989

"Famiglia, Famille, Teaghliag..." 

No matter what language you're speaking; the word FAMILY typically renders the same emotions. Love, comfort, happiness are just some of those warm and fuzzy emotions you see and feel at first glance upon a family.

Me, Two of my Aunts & My Mother

Below the surface is where the truth is buried. I think it comes out like layers of an onion. Everything on the outside is what you see right away. Its the peeling, what you eventually discard after you start to use it.

After the peeling comes the first layer, thats not everything either. Its literally just the beginning of the getting to know family. Names, ages, personalities... so on and so forth.

The Disciplinarian & The Goober

The next few layers is where you start to get to really know the family.

You get to see all the crazy, funny, emotional, annoying and ridiculous crap that no one in the family wants you to see.

You get to see each member in the new light and the roles they play individually in the family...




The funny one, annoying one, the oldest, the baby, the talker, the crazy, the cleanest, the messiest. You see it all... the good, the bad and everything in between.

My family is crazy. 

They're nosey, bossy, and controlling.

Don't get me wrong, I love my family with all of my heart but the truth is they are absolutely nuts and here are the facts.

They are classic "know it all's", ridiculously bossy and feel that they ALWAYS need to tell you just exactly what it is that you are doing wrong. Everything that you do that is different than them or whatnot is a "faze" and for some reason it always seems that no matter how old you get, you will ALWAYS be that little kid that keeps messing up and can never seem to do anything right.

The truth is despite their craziness, deep down, I know most of it is because somewhere in their warped minds they're showing, or attempting to show that they care.

• My grandmothers incessant nagging and pessimistic attitude for instance is her way of protecting me.
• My grandfather's abrupt nature is his way of showing strength for his family. 
• My uncle's ways of "connecting" are cracking jokes that typically aren't that funny and most of the time just plain rude.
• My aunt's overbearing and at times demeaning natures are their ways of trying to direct me in paths different from their own. 

Yes, my family is absolutely insane. The truth is though I wouldn't have it any other way. My family maybe crazy but they're so awesome it is ridiculous. 

They're funny, caring, loving and some of the most interesting and incredible people you will ever have the pleasure of meeting. 

Amo la mia famiglia 

I love my family 

I guess thats the way all families are? Maybe not exactly like mine but in their own ways they manage to all have a little crazy in them. And thats ok with me. 

I'm No Superman

There's something about the thought of Superhero's that intrigues almost every human being at one point or another in their lives.


Wikipedia defines Superhero as "a benevolent fictional character with superhuman powers, such as Superman"...


Seriously, how cool would it be to be Superman???...

Now before you all get a little weird on me let me just clarify a few things here... 

No I am not one of those females that wishes she was a male,

and no I do not have the desire to run around in a spedo and a cape , 

and yes, I know, humans cannot fly....

Yet while I know all of this to be true it doesn't change the fact that, I will most likely always have the desire to be a COMPLETE bad ass, who, no matter what at the end of the day always gets exactly what she wants especially if all I had to do was worry about a little kryptonite.

I guess in our own way us everyday civilians can be "superheroes" at times as well, if you think about it. The military, doctors, nurses, police, firemen... they are our everyday "Superheroes" protecting and saving lives every single moment of every day; never holding anything back and risking everything to do it.  They are the real superheroes of today. 

Part of me still wishes that I could be one of those fictional superheroes though.... With the real powers ;-)

If I could be any superhero though I don't think I would be able to just pick one.... I think I would want to be some kind of mash up of at least the top five superheroes... 

I'd want Spiderman's web thing because well... think about how handy that would be on a day to day basis. 

Clearly I would have to have Wonder Woman's figure along with her AWESOME bracelets ;-)

And although green isn't that great of a color on me... the Hulks badass awesomeness hasn't faltered from my memory TRUST ME. 

To me the coolest thing about superheroes is how selfless they are. I can honestly say that if you aren't family or a really close friend, I don't think I would risk my life to save yours. My fight or flight mode is typically on flight. 

Now, just to help you decipher that last statement a little... There is a HUGE difference between my ability to stick up for myself, give my life for someone I love and my ability to look down the barrel of a .22 on some strangers behalf. 


I will fight to protect myself, my family and my friends. But strangers??? 

Probably not. 

I guess that (and superhuman strength) is what separates me from the tough guys. 

But I've got something they don't... NO KRYPTONITE ;-). 

Hope It Gives You Hell

I know most of you have all been there at some point in your life,

you've loved and been burned...

Run into an old friend from high school that you really didn't wanna see...

Maybe you were cheated on... 

Or maybe you were just cheated...

I think you get the idea...  

either way someone's got a word for those situations.....

or a way to describe it....  

JADED 

that was what one of my very first boyfriends liked to call it... jaded.. 

how lame is that??? 

Honestly...

 please just feel free to put some dark make-up on, 

black clothes and walk around with a really  sad face on...

 ugh.. 

ANYWAYS

For me the song that is linked up to the word 'jaded' above is the best way to describe all of those shitty experiences...

There is something about it that really just sums up the way I've been feeling for a lot of people from my past lately. 

Truth be told I miss you, 

and truth be told I'm LYING.... 

setting the relationship portion of it aside... and just going into the "running into an old friend from high school" portion of it... 

I hate it.. I really, really, REALLY DO. 

See for me the thing I hate the most is the fakeness of it all...

Not every woman is like this but I know a lot of us are... If you're one of the people that aren't I'm just gonna run through the typical scenario really quickly for you... 

Despite our GREAT attempt to completely avoid the person. We fail. So we are then left with two options... 

1.) Be fake-ly sweet like you know they are going to orrrr...

2.) Be honest. 

9 out of 10 times we're fake. 

Why do I call it fake???

Cause truth be told- I really don't give a damn how your doing, and I MOST CERTAINLY do not want to hear about your dog named Spot, your engagement or the fact that you are doing splendid while I am doing awful... 

CRAZY I KNOW. 

But for some reason we stand there... put on the fake smile, grinning and bearing it all the way... 

All the while deep inside our heads you know the other person is thinking the same thing as you... 

"FUCK, FUCK, FUCK... GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

So then comes the REALLY  awkward part..

Which is where you both while pretending to care about each others bull shit start slowly walking backwards in the opposite directions of each other.. 

*hoping that the other person will not notice what your doing..*

.... and then if you're as crafty as I am 

(you'll already have your cell phone in your hand)

you'll find a way to make it ring... Apologize as you "answer" it quickly and then proceed to have a 0.2 second fake conversation on the phone... 

*durning which you will have been informed that you really need to go because you're "friend" is waiting* 

....and so you say your awkward goodbyes, not knowing whether or not to give each other a hug or the high five and then you take off as fast as you can; hoping and praying that doesn't happen again for a while. 

See for me at least it has come to the point in life where all I want to do just stop the madness and speak the truth...

But for now I guess I'll just hope it gives you hell

Loveish

There are more simpler things in life than love. Sometimes one can find it so controversial to love.
Loving is an act that goes above all others, it is the most selfless thing a human being can do. Loving it's confusing and mind boggling... It's what keeps some going and what crushes others. There are too many people that don't know the real meaning of love, what it feels to love or be loved.
There are some people you just want to hold in your arms and love them promising to never stop, never let go, never give up.

I think the hardest person to do that to is yourself.

As human beings we are so critical, judgmental and self-righteous of everyone but worst of all of ourselves. Instead of being our number one fans we are our number one critics. Looking into the mirror and seeing nothing but flaws. It is ok to be constructive about it but most of us are not. Seeing the flaws and laying about in them doing nothing to change them.... Just trying our hardest to cover them up. Over sizing our cars, houses, bodies, our lives trying to make up for what we FEEL we cannot control. Never seeing the beauty in what is natural.

Faster, bigger, better is what we want. Never truly satisfied with what we have. Nothing ever seems to be good enough...

It's sickening if you stop to think about it... Part of me wants to run from this life, this lie that we live day to day... Struggling to make ends meet because we live beyond our means. The other part, the one that is overcome by love stays.

Love is beautiful and ugly, cruel and kind, it's everything you could ever want and everything you don't. It can nourish your soul or it can drain it. It can hold you back, or it can make you a better person, a stronger person, a person that knows who they are because of the person that loves them. I am blessed because the person I love feeds my soul, nourishes my spirit, encourages me to grow, learn and carry onward, but, I am blessed because, most importantly he loves me.